Well I've already programmed in a countdown message that says, "Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one!" And Kat's all ready with hers, so we've just got to get through these last few minutes and then we'll see if our voices still work!!!
Our boss, Jon, suggested we may discover a new voice problem, the opposite of vocal abuse, vocal neglect! I'm starting to wonder.....
Matthew said this morning that he didn't want me to call him when I can speak again, he wants to wait until we're both home then he can see it, and I quote; "Live!" I don't know exactly what I'm going to say to him first, but I've a feeling it'll be something mushy so I won't post it on here!
The last day of work is pretty quiet so Kat and I have been having some nice little chats using our communicators, and speaking with Jon in the office. Although there's been a lot of non-verbal communication in the form of minimal signing, facial expressions and quite possibly some telepathy! Somebody remarked at lunch today that our facial expressions had gotten more exaggerated.
The only really stressful thing to happen today has been that somebody called the office first thing, trying to pass a call on, and got impatient with me as I hadn't managed to get my message accross fast enough, hung up on me and took a message, which they then rang back to quote at me without waiting for a reply! I felt VERY hurt at this, and like they were basically using me as an extended answerphone. Then in the afternoon, somebody else rang the office, I answered the phone, and as soon as they heard my little electronic voice, they hung up! I don't even know who it was!!! Bruce called yesterday and was VERY patient with me, although I think he still finds this all very funny as he kept laughing. Although this does not upset me!
Half an hour to go!
Wednesday, 19 December 2007
A note on bus drivers...and the final hours!!!
Yes, well, what can I say? Actually, I can say that getting the bus was nowhere near the hassle I was expecting! I had three tickets to buy this week, all returns, and I actually think I get them bought faster with the communicator than I would have normally. It makes the whole process a lot more efficient.
Bus driver 1; was by far the best! I was struggling to handle my purse and the communicator at the same time and he made friendly chat with me while I entered my message. It was taking a little longer than I'd hoped, so I showed him the screen so he could see what I was doing and as I'd written "Can I have a return to " he asked "Cheltenham?" and I nodded enthusiastically. He made a comment about how hectic Monday mornings are and how these things seem to want Monday mornings in bed like the rest of us, and gave me my ticket and change with a smile. He didn't even talk slower or add uneccessary geture! So a MASSIVE KUDOS to the driver of the 6.40am number 46 from Stroud to Cheltenham on Monday 17th! For making me feel at ease, not even slightly like I was an inconvenience and for a smooth, on-time ride, too (and he was working so early on a Monday)!
Bus driver 2; was generally polite but seemed a little confused as to what I was trying to do, and I got the feeling he thought maybe I was being a bit lazy showing him a message on a palmtop PC (I used the display method on my morning buses as a lot of people snooze on the ride and I didn't want to disturb them!) rather than speaking it out loud, he didn't seem to realise it would have been much easier for me to speak it!
Bus driver 3; was generally polite and patient but assumed (like a lady in WHSmith the previous day) that I was deaf and mouthed "Thank you" with a thumbs up gesture when I gave her my fare. This made me a bit uncomfortable, but at least she wasn't patronising.
So it's our last day!!! Thank goodness!!!!! I will be so glad to be able to be myself again. I think really it wasn't the different way of communicating that got to me so much, as I could still get my message accross, it was more that I wasn't being myself. Our identities are so wrapped up in things like this, and this is why continuing development of synthetic voices and more efficient communicators is essential. The voice a person uses on a communication aid becomes their voice and part of their personality, and the way they use their communication aid is the way they communicate.
One thing that has gotten to me is how people around college kept saying hi, and when I waved back, some of them would say "Oh, you're still on your silence!", that shows quite a poor attitude towards communication-aids if they thought I was doing a sponsored silence!!! Either that, or they didn't read the multiple e-mails I sent around college to explain what we're doing, or they just assumed that because I didn't get out my communicator in those brief encounters and they'd heard something about us not speaking that it must be a sponsored silence.
Signing off for now!
Lucy
Bus driver 1; was by far the best! I was struggling to handle my purse and the communicator at the same time and he made friendly chat with me while I entered my message. It was taking a little longer than I'd hoped, so I showed him the screen so he could see what I was doing and as I'd written "Can I have a return to " he asked "Cheltenham?" and I nodded enthusiastically. He made a comment about how hectic Monday mornings are and how these things seem to want Monday mornings in bed like the rest of us, and gave me my ticket and change with a smile. He didn't even talk slower or add uneccessary geture! So a MASSIVE KUDOS to the driver of the 6.40am number 46 from Stroud to Cheltenham on Monday 17th! For making me feel at ease, not even slightly like I was an inconvenience and for a smooth, on-time ride, too (and he was working so early on a Monday)!
Bus driver 2; was generally polite but seemed a little confused as to what I was trying to do, and I got the feeling he thought maybe I was being a bit lazy showing him a message on a palmtop PC (I used the display method on my morning buses as a lot of people snooze on the ride and I didn't want to disturb them!) rather than speaking it out loud, he didn't seem to realise it would have been much easier for me to speak it!
Bus driver 3; was generally polite and patient but assumed (like a lady in WHSmith the previous day) that I was deaf and mouthed "Thank you" with a thumbs up gesture when I gave her my fare. This made me a bit uncomfortable, but at least she wasn't patronising.
So it's our last day!!! Thank goodness!!!!! I will be so glad to be able to be myself again. I think really it wasn't the different way of communicating that got to me so much, as I could still get my message accross, it was more that I wasn't being myself. Our identities are so wrapped up in things like this, and this is why continuing development of synthetic voices and more efficient communicators is essential. The voice a person uses on a communication aid becomes their voice and part of their personality, and the way they use their communication aid is the way they communicate.
One thing that has gotten to me is how people around college kept saying hi, and when I waved back, some of them would say "Oh, you're still on your silence!", that shows quite a poor attitude towards communication-aids if they thought I was doing a sponsored silence!!! Either that, or they didn't read the multiple e-mails I sent around college to explain what we're doing, or they just assumed that because I didn't get out my communicator in those brief encounters and they'd heard something about us not speaking that it must be a sponsored silence.
Signing off for now!
Lucy
Tuesday, 18 December 2007
One day left...over £700!!!
Well we're on the last stretch now! We officially get our voices back in just under 28 hours! I can't wait!!!
One of the biggest lessons I have taken from this is that my voice and the way I usually communicate are central to who I am. I always had a reputation for being chatty and I have been described before as a great person to talk to, so I guess communication is my forte! No wondering about whether I'm in the right profession!
It was still embarrassing to hear myself on the radio - even if I was using a synthetic male voice at the time! You can catch it in the next 24 hours on the BBC Gloucestershire website by clicking on the "Listen again" tab by the Radio box near the top right of the page.
Bruce came and filmed us listening to it with the rest of the department, and afterwards he asked them some questions on what they thought of us doing this and how they thought we were doing and they all said really lovely things! It really cheered me up to hear them!
It's all go here at college with us breaking up tomorrow, the students had a Christmas show this morning and this afternoon is the Staff review - a sort of variety show by staff (and some students). It should be great to watch, especially as at least one of our communication aid-using students is taking part!
I'll add more later, for now, I'm off to watch something very entertaining!
Monday, 17 December 2007
Two and a half days left...
Well the weekend panned out ok.
The Farmers' Market went well (see entry below), we went to Ikea on Saturday night, and we got the rest of the food shopping on Sunday and tried to relax.
Speaking to Kat this morning it seems we have had very shared experiences despite using different devices.
To be honest I have noticed myself avoiding a lot of situations where I normally would have chatted away, and I have let Matthew do some of the talking in places like Ikea. And as with Kat, I have been using signing and gesture a lot at home and rarely use the communicator around Matthew (I now get why some of our students are reluctant to take them home at the weekend and holidays! It's more of a problem if they leave it or the chrager behind than it is a problem for them to communicate with their families without it!). Although I did weigh up the inconvenience of having to get out of our lovely warm bed last night to get my communicator off charge over the inconvenience of having to finger-spell the whole thing I wanted to say. In the end, I chose to spell it out, I was too cosy!
Bed time has been an area I didn't realise would change so much. I am one of these people whose brain seems to do most of it's processing at the end of the day, so when other people are drifting off to sleep, suddenly a million thoughts and worries pop into my head and I usually talk to Matthew about these, but this is much more difficult without speaking or having my communicator to hand, and I found myself either stashing thoughts away in the think-about-it-tomorrow part of my brain, or finger spelling key words and hoping Matthew would guess the rest (which, thankfully, he did).
Luckily my communicator is less frustrating as the days wear on, as it is learning what I say and how I communicate quite quickly, and I am becoming more patient with it. And I have had the time to edit the pages enough that I have stored messages for almost all of my regular situations.
I think I will have JUST got the hang of this fully by 4pm Wednesday!!!
We are going to BBC Radio Gloucestershire today to have an interview and a chat with one of our students (who uses the same communication aid as Katrina) in a pub while they record it, which sounds fun!!! And hopefully will be more fun than work!
The Farmers' Market went well (see entry below), we went to Ikea on Saturday night, and we got the rest of the food shopping on Sunday and tried to relax.
Speaking to Kat this morning it seems we have had very shared experiences despite using different devices.
To be honest I have noticed myself avoiding a lot of situations where I normally would have chatted away, and I have let Matthew do some of the talking in places like Ikea. And as with Kat, I have been using signing and gesture a lot at home and rarely use the communicator around Matthew (I now get why some of our students are reluctant to take them home at the weekend and holidays! It's more of a problem if they leave it or the chrager behind than it is a problem for them to communicate with their families without it!). Although I did weigh up the inconvenience of having to get out of our lovely warm bed last night to get my communicator off charge over the inconvenience of having to finger-spell the whole thing I wanted to say. In the end, I chose to spell it out, I was too cosy!
Bed time has been an area I didn't realise would change so much. I am one of these people whose brain seems to do most of it's processing at the end of the day, so when other people are drifting off to sleep, suddenly a million thoughts and worries pop into my head and I usually talk to Matthew about these, but this is much more difficult without speaking or having my communicator to hand, and I found myself either stashing thoughts away in the think-about-it-tomorrow part of my brain, or finger spelling key words and hoping Matthew would guess the rest (which, thankfully, he did).
Luckily my communicator is less frustrating as the days wear on, as it is learning what I say and how I communicate quite quickly, and I am becoming more patient with it. And I have had the time to edit the pages enough that I have stored messages for almost all of my regular situations.
I think I will have JUST got the hang of this fully by 4pm Wednesday!!!
We are going to BBC Radio Gloucestershire today to have an interview and a chat with one of our students (who uses the same communication aid as Katrina) in a pub while they record it, which sounds fun!!! And hopefully will be more fun than work!
Saturday, 15 December 2007
Busy day!!!
Firstly, a little info from yesterday (as I got home and quite literally had to crash out on the sofa as I was exhausted and didn't feel up to switching on our PC). I decided to pluck up some courage and (for the first time since getting the communication aid) go and browse a favourite shop of mine on the way home. Eclipse is located in Stroud and stocks some quite lovely and unique clothes and has very friendly staff. I'd seen a top in their window that the girly part of my brain went a bit nuts over and thought I'd check out how much it was. I browsed for a little while, then making eye-contact with the staff, they said "Hello! How are you?" (they're very friendly with everyone, but I've been in a few times, so they recognised me, too), so I marched up to the counter, held up a finger in a polite "give me a sec" gesture and selected my little message that says I'm using a communication aid for a week. Fully expecting panic or confusion, I was very pleased when they expressed an interest to know more and we had a nice little chat about my communication aid and National Star College. Then I went home feeling quite brave and proud of myself for actually initiating a conversation having deliberately gone into the store to (hopefully) do so.
Today Bruce came round to Stroud to film Matthew and I for the website going Christmas shopping at Stroud Farmers' Market. Bruce was a little late due to his SatNav taking him to Minchinhampton and Nailsworth rather than Stroud, and I think he managed to profoundly confuse a Nailsworth shop owner by asking him where the market was, with a reply of "I think it's in a garden somewhere."...we're lucky he found us at all! I had to use Matthew as my human communication aid to call Bruce on his mobile to check on his progress, as I'm still not a competant phone user with my little communicator.
We accomplished buying everything we wanted to. Buying cheese from Godsells Church Farm (their "Holy Smoked" Oak-smoked Gloucester cheese is amazing!), fresh soup (which we had for lunch and it was bloody gorgeous!), some cake, some local wine, some mistletoe (sp?), three baking potatoes and a little potted Christmas tree. I actually used my communicator to ask for all of these except the tree as Matthew knew more about it than I did anyway. And Bruce cunningly filmed us (this should be available to view sometime next week).
Overall, I was pleasantly surprised at how easy it was! I was expecting a full-on battle to get vendors' attention and then to be ignored once they got bored with waiting for my responses, but every vendor was patient, quite a few very curious, none were unpleasant or against us filming them, and the only real difference I noticed between their usual behaviour and that of today was that when it took me a while to type in my message, they might start serving another customer, then jump right back to me when I was ready (it was very busy, I didn't begrudge them this at all!), and one vendor was obviously a little thrown by my lack of vocality and hesitated a bit, giving quick glances to Matthew for reassurance or guidance (I'm not sure which). I was actually quite surprised at how some of the vendors even took it entirely in their stride and didn't even seem to register it as anything out of the ordinary. In any case, I managed to hand out quite a few cards with this website on it, so if any of you are reading this, kudos on your people-skills (and a big pat on the back for such lovely produce!).
We then went back to our house for Bruce to interview Matthew on his view of this. That will also be available on here for sometime next week. He was very sweet, and Bruce provoked some very interesting thoughts from him. He even said he missed the sound of my voice!
We are now at Matthew's parents and I have been showing the communication aid to Matthew's brother, Simon (who has a speech impediment) who was most impressed! Being a lover of all things Mac I thought he may be put off as it's a Microsoft-based device, but the features of it as a communicator seemed to please him so much he wasn't concerned with this at all! He especially found the nifty little feature of being able to select on release rather than tap wonderful, as his dexterity is not as coodinated as mine. And we found the display mode very handy to have private conversations with!
All day I have been thinking of Kat, who is using her communication aid for her first full day today and is off to her husband's Christmas party with it. Kat, if you're reading this, good luck!
Signing off for now!
Lucy.
Today Bruce came round to Stroud to film Matthew and I for the website going Christmas shopping at Stroud Farmers' Market. Bruce was a little late due to his SatNav taking him to Minchinhampton and Nailsworth rather than Stroud, and I think he managed to profoundly confuse a Nailsworth shop owner by asking him where the market was, with a reply of "I think it's in a garden somewhere."...we're lucky he found us at all! I had to use Matthew as my human communication aid to call Bruce on his mobile to check on his progress, as I'm still not a competant phone user with my little communicator.
We accomplished buying everything we wanted to. Buying cheese from Godsells Church Farm (their "Holy Smoked" Oak-smoked Gloucester cheese is amazing!), fresh soup (which we had for lunch and it was bloody gorgeous!), some cake, some local wine, some mistletoe (sp?), three baking potatoes and a little potted Christmas tree. I actually used my communicator to ask for all of these except the tree as Matthew knew more about it than I did anyway. And Bruce cunningly filmed us (this should be available to view sometime next week).
Overall, I was pleasantly surprised at how easy it was! I was expecting a full-on battle to get vendors' attention and then to be ignored once they got bored with waiting for my responses, but every vendor was patient, quite a few very curious, none were unpleasant or against us filming them, and the only real difference I noticed between their usual behaviour and that of today was that when it took me a while to type in my message, they might start serving another customer, then jump right back to me when I was ready (it was very busy, I didn't begrudge them this at all!), and one vendor was obviously a little thrown by my lack of vocality and hesitated a bit, giving quick glances to Matthew for reassurance or guidance (I'm not sure which). I was actually quite surprised at how some of the vendors even took it entirely in their stride and didn't even seem to register it as anything out of the ordinary. In any case, I managed to hand out quite a few cards with this website on it, so if any of you are reading this, kudos on your people-skills (and a big pat on the back for such lovely produce!).
We then went back to our house for Bruce to interview Matthew on his view of this. That will also be available on here for sometime next week. He was very sweet, and Bruce provoked some very interesting thoughts from him. He even said he missed the sound of my voice!
We are now at Matthew's parents and I have been showing the communication aid to Matthew's brother, Simon (who has a speech impediment) who was most impressed! Being a lover of all things Mac I thought he may be put off as it's a Microsoft-based device, but the features of it as a communicator seemed to please him so much he wasn't concerned with this at all! He especially found the nifty little feature of being able to select on release rather than tap wonderful, as his dexterity is not as coodinated as mine. And we found the display mode very handy to have private conversations with!
All day I have been thinking of Kat, who is using her communication aid for her first full day today and is off to her husband's Christmas party with it. Kat, if you're reading this, good luck!
Signing off for now!
Lucy.
Friday, 14 December 2007
WOW!
So giving people the benefit of the doubt seems to have been the right choice, I knew my friends would come through for me!!!
New thankies to throw at Laura for her comment and for donations;
Helen
Dawn
Caroline
Simon (yay!)
En extra big special thanks to Gregor Minto for his current email, comment on here, donation to the fundraising site and helping with the loan of the communicator in the first place!!!
We're £20 away from the £400 mark on the site! And Kat's still got some to put on there from people she knows! Wait!!! Make that £10 thanks to my lovely Auntie Deborah!
I just made the idiotic mistake of speaking again! As predicted, it was just a really little thing and it surprises me how automatic it is to speak out loud.
Since I started this my inner monologue has gone into overdrive, and these little outbursts that I have made seem to be overflow from this as they are really random thoughts rather than conversation. I'm fine in conversation!!!
Bruce filmed me getting my lunch for a montage of video to be compiled after the week is over. I actually asked for a jacket potato with beans, but because I said "Can I have a jacket potato with beans please?" The staff member serving me misheard it (the cafeteria is pretty noisy) and I got a jacket potato with beans and cheese (spot the mistake!). I didn't complain, though! The only minor problem we encountered was that I had forgotten to pre-programme anything to say if I wanted to eat there or take it away. Luckily typing the phrase "to go" didn't take long!
I am actually REALLY looking forward to a nice, quiet night in tonight!
Lucy
New thankies to throw at Laura for her comment and for donations;
Helen
Dawn
Caroline
Simon (yay!)
En extra big special thanks to Gregor Minto for his current email, comment on here, donation to the fundraising site and helping with the loan of the communicator in the first place!!!
We're £20 away from the £400 mark on the site! And Kat's still got some to put on there from people she knows! Wait!!! Make that £10 thanks to my lovely Auntie Deborah!
I just made the idiotic mistake of speaking again! As predicted, it was just a really little thing and it surprises me how automatic it is to speak out loud.
Since I started this my inner monologue has gone into overdrive, and these little outbursts that I have made seem to be overflow from this as they are really random thoughts rather than conversation. I'm fine in conversation!!!
Bruce filmed me getting my lunch for a montage of video to be compiled after the week is over. I actually asked for a jacket potato with beans, but because I said "Can I have a jacket potato with beans please?" The staff member serving me misheard it (the cafeteria is pretty noisy) and I got a jacket potato with beans and cheese (spot the mistake!). I didn't complain, though! The only minor problem we encountered was that I had forgotten to pre-programme anything to say if I wanted to eat there or take it away. Luckily typing the phrase "to go" didn't take long!
I am actually REALLY looking forward to a nice, quiet night in tonight!
Lucy
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